Thoughts on Change...

Last night, I was reading about the difference between courage and cowardice, and what it means to be courageous. I have been learning a lot about courage this tri-mester and I have to admit that I have not been very courageous. I often flee from things that stir up hard emotions for me and I often fear, both of those things do not show a life marked by courage. The Spirit has really been working on me in this area and transforming me. Well, as I went to bed last night I have to say I felt pretty good and content as I reflected on this past tri-mester and as I thought about the transformation that has been taking place in my life and how God has been at work. Then this morning, it was brought to my attention that there are some thoughts and emotions that I have been intentionally fleeing from instead of confronting them and bringing them before God. Needless to say I am a work in progress.

What thoughts and emotions have I been fleeing from? My thoughts about the change that is and will be taking place at school, in relationships, over Christmas, and in the future. My emotions of sadness, joy, and loss. Anyone that knows me knows that I am not a fan of change. To be completely honest I don't like change, but I am learning to appreciate it and see the divine beauty of it. Let me expand on this a bit.

As I went for a walk today I did what I normally do when I not sure how to put into words what I am feeling so I just ramble in prayer to God. I lay everything out before Him and then somewhere in my ramblings God slows me down. It is like, once I get everything out that is on my heart God is like, "Okay now just listen to me, my child, and think about what you just said". As I walked I prayed about everything that is in my heart concerning the changes coming up and I cried, something that I have not allowed myself to do until now. I have been intentionally trying to keep myself busy and distracted in order to not dwell on the changes that are and will be taking place.

Then as I continued to walk, God helped me to see His beauty and blessings in the changes. Change allows room for transformation, my life is living testimony to this. The beauty of change is that God makes everything new with every new change. He is faithful and sovereign. Change also allows room for growth and maturity in God. Change opens doors for new lessons to be learned and can help deepen our understanding of the Lord and His creation. Change is not something that should be feared but embraced.

This is not to say that change does not also bring about some sense of loss and sadness, but in that sadness you can also find peace and contentment in the Lord, because you know that He is in control over all things.

Sharing is caring...

So let me now add sharing to the list of things that I have been learning about. Over the past few months, I have been learning a lot about the importance of sharing. Now I know that this seems like an elementary topic, but I am not talking about sharing toys or material objects. I am talking about sharing your life, this includes: your sorrows, your struggles, your love, your joy, your faith, etc. Why is it so hard to share some of these things with others?

I know why it has been hard for me to share because I have had a fear of people. I believe if we looked at everyone's answers to the question above all of our answers would be connected by the same word...fear. We all have or have had this fear of people to some degree. I have been learning about how to overcome this fear by placing my fear in the Lord and believing in His sovereignty.

Since, I started on this journey to overcoming my fear of people I have been trying to open myself up more and more to people. I have purposefully been placing myself in some uncomfortable positions in order to be stretched and rely on God's strength. I have talked to people that normally I wouldn't talk to and I have shared bits and pieces of my life that normally I wouldn't share. This has not been an easy process, but I am starting to see everything coming together. I am starting to see the importance of sharing your life with others and being transparent.

There is something beautiful that takes place when you share your life with someone else. I have felt so encouraged by some people that I have shared with recently and God has used them to encourage me to keep on sharing. By sharing my life with others, I am opening myself up to them and being transparent. I am also being obedient to God by trying to live out 2 Corinthians 13:11, "Strive for full restoration, encourage one another, be of one mind, live in peace". There is always the risk of rejection, but that is a risk I am willing to take because I know that God is in control over all things and that my identity is in Him.

You never know what might come out of simply saying hi, smiling, or stopping to talk. There is one conversation that I will never forget from high school...a few days before graduation a girl walked up to me and said, "Chelsea, I just want to say thank you for always saying hi and waving at me in the hallway". I wasn't sure why she was thanking me so I smiled and said, "Your welcome, but everyone says hi in the hallway". Her next response shocked me, "No they don't. You are the only one who did". You never know what is going on in someone's life so slow down, and take some time to share with one another and build one another up in the Lord.

Coming back from the beach...

I absolutely love swimming and being in the water. Ever since I was a small child, I have always loved swimming and spending time in the pool. However, now that I have been blessed with the opportunity to travel outside of the flat lands of Illinois I have fallen in love with the beach. There is just something about being tossed about by the waves and seeing the beauty of ocean, sand, and palm trees that is just so surreal. I can't look at a beach and not think about God and His power and love for us. Thank you God.


Something else that I have discovered that I love is hammocks. Oh my word, I absolutely love laying in a hammock. It doesn't even have to be at a beach. I just love the way that you sink into them and can read for hours. Somewhere in my future home there will be a hammock.

Those are some things that I have discovered that I love but let me share with you some more things that I have learned. These are some lessons and things that God has been teaching me over the past several months (in no particular order):

• You must laugh at yourself every now and then, don't miss out on the funny side of life. It is good to laugh. The fact that God created us all with different laughs is incredible, use your laughter to make others laugh.

• Don't be so task-oriented that you miss being in the moment with the people around you. I am learning to be more people-oriented. It is easy for me to focus on a task and ignore the people around me. Being task-oriented isn't a bad thing, but it is when you don't take into consideration other people and when you start missing out on an opportunity for fellowship.

• Your relationship with the Lord is what matters most, because it is out of that relationship that everything else flows: your love for others, your choice of words, forgiveness, grace, kindness, etc. The list could go on and on. Cling to the Lord and dwell on His Word. 

• It is important to have a holy fear of God. It is easy for us as humans to place our fear in many things: people, the future, finances, etc. When we put our fear in God what else do we have to fear? nothing. God is sovereign and in control. Develop a holy fear of God.

• Appreciate life. Don't take life for granted. Even in the darkest of moments there is light, you might just need someone else to help you see it. Each day is a gift from God, a gift of grace and love. 

• Embrace trails, don't runaway from them no matter how hard or painful they might be. God sees your struggles and knows what you need before you ask, just stick with it. God is in control. Look to Him for guidance and strength. He knows your struggling. Everyone goes through times of trials, you are not alone. Remain in the Lord. 

• Open yourself up to others. Share your hardships and burdens with others and live in community. If someone offers to help take it, if no one offers ask for it. We all need some help sometimes. Don't be too proud, stubborn, or afraid to open yourself up to others. Always show and give love, grace, and forgiveness to others.

• Sometimes you have to do things that you don't want to do. That is just a fact of life. You have to take into consideration other people and first and foremost you have to be obedient to God. I don't always feel like being obedient, but I must be an example of Christ and I am not going to do that by doing only what I feel like doing.  

• There is a time and place to say, "no". Be careful not to get burned out and take time to rest. Rest not only physically but also mentally and spiritually. Rest in the Lord and lean on His understanding.

Those are just a few things that God has been teaching me.

Happy Thanksgiving...

Thankful list 

(This list is not in order or complete, this is a compact list of a few things for today.)

1. I am thankful for cellphones, even though 90% of the time I don't like them and get annoyed by them. I got to talk to my mom and dad today for the first time via cellphone in a long long long time.  I forgot what it will be like to live at home and just be able to call the ones that I love and miss any time I want. I have to admit hearing my parents' voice and calling them brought tears to my eyes. I also received a very sweet unexpected message on my cellphone from my best friend, again tears of happiness filled my eyes.

2. I am thankful for friends who bring laughter, food, coffee, and tears of happiness into my life. :) I am also very thankful for their friendship and for allowing me to be apart of their lives.

3. I am thankful for trials. Over the past few weeks, I have been able to see how God has been weaving a common theme and lesson into my life. I have also been able to see how He has allowed some trials into my life in order that I may mature in my walk with Him.

4. I am grateful for the transformation that God has done not only in my life but also in the lives of others. I am so thankful for His great love and sacrifice for us.

5. I am thankful for a warm bed to climb into every night and for the food that God provides for me every day.

6. I am thankful for being able to be a part of the ministry at Valle del Sol.

7. I am thankful for children, no matter their age. 

8. I am thankful for people who use their hands and feet to help others, no matter how big or how small the need might be. 

Today is the Day...

Today has been a wonderful day, thank you Lord. Today was my day of rest. Some people might say that my day was not a day of rest because I spent most of my afternoon at the children's ministry, but being apart of the ministry at Valle Del Sol is a joy and a blessing. The joy and happiness that the Lord fills my heart with when I am with those kiddos is incredible. Seeing their smiling faces is the best part of my week. My favorite part of today was watching them pray. All I had to say was lets close our eyes and pray, then automatically all of the children folded their hands and closed their eyes and repeated the prayer. I couldn't help but smile from ear to ear. Then later on when the children were coloring and the older classroom was in the same room doing their lesson, Horacio (the teacher for the older kids) started asking questions about the Bible and the kids in my class over heard and started yelling out the answers they knew (oh that made my heart and soul so glad).

The Lord provided us with a creation lesson today. Yesterday evening, I realized that I forgot to copy the coloring pages for the lesson so it looked like we weren't going to have a normal lesson this week. Then last night while I was organizing the mess of papers on my desk that I have kept shifting from place to place I found a folder full of lessons, thanks mama. Now not only did we have a lesson today, but we also have lessons for the next 4 weeks! Thank you Lord.

Now that would have been more than enough to make for a wonderful day, but God didn't stop there. I have felt all day this sense of peace and contentment that I haven't felt in a long time and it has been great. Thank you Lord.

These are the verses that have been on my heart and mind this week:

"Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you." 
- Philippians 4:4-9

A Small Portion of my Upcoming Newsletter

As many of you know through my blog, I have had many struggles since my arrival in Costa Rica. My time here has not been a “walk in the park,” but I would not have it any other way. Through my trials and struggles, I have learned so much about God, life, fear, the importance of the mind and discipline, others, and myself. In these past 8 months I have matured a lot in my walk with the Lord, and it has been an incredible journey. He has had to break me down piece by piece in order to lift me up with His mighty hand. I am completely blown away by His love and grace.

“Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we boast in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame,”- Romans 5:1-5a (NIV)

Oh where to begin...
Thank you Lord so much for this past week. Thank you for everything, the good, the ugly, the silly, the sadness, the great views and conversations, and the laughter. Thank you, Lord.

This past week was an exceptionally great week, glory be to God. I will be honest there were times this week when I just did not feel like I had the mental or emotional strength to get through and God continually lifted me up. Some of the repeating words in my head kept going back towards the truth found in these verses.

"Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you." - 1 Peter 5:6-7

I do not hold God up. He holds me up with His righteous hand, and I am learning to fall and rest in His arms. Falling is something that I am quite good at but I know that there is always someone there to break my fall. I never truly hit rock bottom even though some times it feels like it. God is always there. Many times I feel like I am a child who is flailing about in the arms of their Father and all God wants me to do is relax and rest in Him. He wants me to stop trying to figure everything out and stop analyzing every little thing in life and just trust in Him and His will. I need to stop trying to be good enough and realize that He made me good and that His love and grace is enough.