Do you ever have those moments that you wish you could freeze in time or at least in your long-term memory bank? I know I do. Like for example, my first time going out of the country. Looking back, I now wonder what it felt like to enter Mexico or what I smelled as soon as I crossed the border. I wonder how silly I must have looked when trying to speak Spanish and interact with the children. It is during those precious moments that I try so hard to soak in everything so that later on I can remember exactly how I felt and how things were. However, no matter what I do I always seem to forget something. One way that helps me remember all of my feelings and experiences is journaling. I love to journal, but I often find myself struggling to write on paper because I am not sure what to say or what to keep out or add, and then before you know it I have either wrote too much or later on I remember things I should have added. There are many things that I have not added to this blog and to my previous journals but bear with me as I continue to try to share my precious moments and thoughts with you.
This past week has been a whirlwind of events. My grandfather Leon passed away, which has been very hard. I don't quite remember crying so much in one week as I have this past week. However, I have loved spending time with my family and bonding with some relatives that I don't get to see nearly as much as I would like too. This has been one of my biggest fears in being away from home, I have feared that the ones I love will pass away and I won't be able to be there to mourn or help comfort my family. It still bothers me that I may not always be able to come home when I lose a loved one, but now I see that although it is very difficult and very hard.... life must go on. I kept hearing over and over again this past week, "Death is just apart of life".
Even though, you may want to slap the person who tells you that while you are mourning you have to admit that it is true. Death will come to us all, it is just apart of life, but with the Lord's strength and guidance life will go on and the world will keep on spinning even when it feels like there is no hope. One thing I know for certain is that we can always find our hope in the Lord.
