Exciting News....

I have some exciting news but I can´t share it quite yet. This Friday I will let all of you know what it is. I am so excited for this weekend and to be able to participate in a different kind of ministry for at least a little while.

This past week has been a complete 360 degree turn from a few weeks ago when I was really down. A few weeks ago, I started loosing track about why I was here and why God has sent me here. Satan works in many ways and when you are lonely and tired, it is a prime opportunity for him to try and get you off track from what God is doing in your life. Having a lot of time here in Costa Rica to think is good as long as you keep your mind and eyes fixed on what is good. The key is to always keeping your focus on the Lord even during times of sorrow or trials. The Lord is my strength and my stronghold, on Him rest my everything.

The darkness does not stay around for long, even though when you are going through the darkness it can feel like a long time. God is good and my attitude and my mind have been completely focused on what is good. You would be surprise how much your attitude can change when you focus in the moment and focus on the Lord. In my opinion, it is always more fun to be an optimist then it is to be a pessimist. Each day I wake up excited to see what God is going to do and what He has in store, and this attitude does not just come from when the Lord blesses you or gives you want you want. If you truly trust in the Lord, you will have a good attitude because you know that He is in control.

I have been filling my mind not only with a ton of Spanish but also a lot of Scripture and wisdom from people who have gone before me. Like I said before, I stopped reading the news which I found to be really depressing, and instead I am reading the Bible and some Christian books and articles, like the one I read on Tom and Diane Hallam (thanks for sharing that article with me). My reading time and time of solitude have now turned into a precious time for me to be with the Lord and reflect on His love and grace. I did this all before but now I have extended my time so instead of going into my time of devotion with say just 30 minutes, I don´t put any limits on it and I just let go and give that time to the Lord. It is has been a wonderful time and I look forward to it every day.

Satan really tries to bring the followers of God down into darkness here at ILE, but it is great to see all of the families and missionaries staying strong. Even though many people here have been facing some real hardships (adjustment issues, family issues, health issues, etc.), they have all been able to find strength and hope in the Lord. It has also been wonderful to be surrounded and supported by such a strong body of believers.

When you have time to think....

Time that is something we, as Americans, are very concerned with. Where are we spending our time, is our time productive, or how much time do we have. If someone is late is it considered rude. Here in Costa Rica it is like you have nothing but time. You can always have more time but not more life as the saying here goes. Life is what is happening now in the moment not later on or in an hour but right now.

But as an American, I am not use to having so much time. In the States I am so concerned with filling my time with this that and the other thing, that sometimes I forget to just relax and take in the moments that are set before me. Sometimes I even dreaded having time because then that would mean I would actually have to think through that disagreement or frustration from that day. Where as if I were busy I wouldn't "have time" to focus on what was bothering me or focus that person who hurt me.

Well here I have plenty of time to think about God, life, and my emotions. When I am alone I often do reflect on God and my life. That can be great but it can also be hard. Those moments force me to see me for who I am, but it also allows me to see God for who He is. Faithful, good, just, and many more things that I realize I am not. This time allows me to see me as me and see God as God, which is wonderful. It just shows me how amazing God is and how much more work I need to do in my own life. I am not perfect but in God I can see the woman/the human being that I want to be. Each day is a day that allows me to take one step closer to being that woman. As God continues to form me and mold me into the woman He designed me to be.

Welcome to Church...

I do go to a Spanish service on Sundays but I also listened to this sermon today and thought that I would share it with all of you. This sermon spoke to me today in many ways.

Little by Little

Saturday is becoming my favorite day of the week.

I woke up this morning and went to the Feria, an open fresh market, by myself to buy some lettuce, apples, and grapes. (These will be my snacks for the week.) It was fantastic. I got to practice some of my Spanish and I ran into some friends. I have a hard time understanding the price of things but I am working on it. I also went to the pastry shop and bought a cinnamon Apple roll and a milk box for breakfast, the combination was deliciouso!

Afterwards, I came home dropped off my things and then went with Kelly and a friend to downtown San José. We went to a thrift shop and to the artisan market. Then I had to leave them because I had to get back by 12:45pm to eat lunch and go see the kids.

Before I headed home I walked down the sidewalk and stopped in at POPS, the best ice cream shop in Costa Rica. I ordered a frozen cappuccino to wake me up and then I decided to sit down and people watch. I sat for about 20 minutes watching the people walk up and down the sidewalk. I tried to take in some of the cultural views like how people interact with one another and how people dress. Skinny jeans are diffently the style here. It was alot of fun.

Then I headed to the bus stop to go home. I was so thankful that the bus was there when I arrived so I did not have to wait along time. Once I got on the bus, I do have to admit that I got a little teary eyed because it finally hit me today that I can do this on my own. I did alot of things on my own today and it felt great, I know the Lord was with me. For the past couple of weeks, I really doubted my ability to live in another country on my own because of how fearful I am. I am afraid of alot of things but little by little those fears are going away and I am learning how to live by myself.

I also went and worked with the kids today too which always brightens my week. It was so much fun and all of my kids showed up. I led the prayer again and I led the Spanish/English lesson/coloring time with the younger kids. They are learning alot and they are all so bright.

Today was a great day!

The Circle of Life

I have always been an optimist even though the world would rather me not. There is so much good in the world that tends to get overlooked by all of the bad and hatred. I have noticed this lately in reading the news so I have stopped reading it at least for now. Reading the news is depressing. There is always a story about someone hurting a child, someone killing another human being, or someone dying. This I know is the hard facts of life but I don't need to be reminded of it every day.

What I do need to reminded of is God's presence, love, and grace. I need to look at people the way that He looks at people. I need to love like He loves.

This is something we all need to do a bit more of. Our lives change constantly, as some say we are all going through the circle of life, but let us not get so caught up in life that we forget at look at through God's eyes. Let us not forget the beauty and good that is at work in this world. I get to see this beauty and good every day in the eyes of my friends and family, who are striving to make this world a better place through God's word and guidance. I also get to see this beauty in the eyes of the children I work with. When I look into their eyes I see hope and I see good, sometimes I believe I can even see a slight glimpse of God. 

Let us be grateful for what we do have and live in the moment. Let us not be focused on what we wish was different in our lives or in the world, but let our eyes be focused on the Creator of the world. Let us each day give thanks and try in our own simple ways to make this world a little bit better for those around us. Maybe you can be a shining a light in a dark place for someone in need.

God uses Mose to speak to my heart...

Sometimes I read about the Israelites and think, "Man, they complained alot to God". But then I am reminded of my own life and how when things get tough I usually call out to God, saying, "God what are you doing now?" or I cry out and say, "God please help me".  God has been using the Israelites also to remind me about God's faithfulness. God always provided and always kept His promises to the Israelites, and the same is true in my life. Looking back on my life I can see God's faithfulness and His handprints all over my life. God is good.

God has also been using Moses to speak to my heart alot. Have you ever thought about Moses' life? His life was far from easy and he was far from perfect, but God was faithful. Moses commited murder, ranaway from his problems, went into a foreign land, and was almost killed by God. That to me does not sound like any easy life. Staying in the desert for 40 years also does not sound like my idea of a good time, but God was faithful. Moses followed the Lord no matter where he was called to go or what he was called to do. Moses learned to trust God and gave up his life to follow God's calling on his life.

However, Moses quickly learned early on that he could not do this all on his own, he needed God and he needed people who were willing to become leaders. I am not overwhelmed with work or with problems, but I do see the benefits of working together and delegating responsibilities. We as people were not made to be alone. We were made to be in relationships. We were made to be in a relationship with God and with others.

Also, being an alien in a foreign land, I can relate to that right now.

Llueve todo los dias en Costa Rica

My title loosely translates to , "Rain every day in Costa Rica". I am finding out the more I learn about Spanish the harder it is to translate. I definitely have a new found respect for translaters. Not everything translates word for word.

Yesterday, I got the chance to introduce to mi meastra, my teacher, the idea of a bad hair day. She had a lot of fun with that one. Here if we were to say someone is having a bad hair day or if someone looks really tired, we would say añejo or añeja depending on if you are talking about a boy or girl. The "j" in Spanish comes out as an "h" sound when you say the word. Grammar class is alot of fun, our teacher is great.

Today, has been a good day. I broke down in class yesterday and started crying but I think that is just what I needed to move forward. I just needed a moment to cry. I have learned that I need to be more proactive about speaking even though 90% of what comes out of my mouth might be wrong.  Ticos are not shy about correcting you so that is a good thing.

As I said earlier it rains every day right now it has been raining for about 3 hours. The rainy season has definitely started. I don't mind the rain though except for when I am tired because it puts me to sleep when I am trying my hardest to stay awake. Not even my strong cup of coffee is enough to keep me awake anymore. Learning a new language can really make you tired because your brain is working over time. I have to think not just about the words I am try saying but also if I conjugating them right, pronouncing them right, and forming my mouth right. There is alot that goes into trying to form one word and that is not even trying to form a whole a sentence, which is what I am learning how to do now. Each day though it gets a little easier. As mamí says, "little by little".

Within the next two weeks, I will start having a tutor that will help me practice my Spanish. I am looking forward to that. Also, I am looking forward to chapel tomorrow where we, as a student body, get to take communion together. I really love going to chapel.

Well, I should get back to doing my homework. Buenos Noches.